Children, Money, and Good Stewardship of God's Gifts

Several years ago, I regularly blogged for OCN's Sounding Blog, while the blog still exists, I recently discovered that the articles I contributed have not been maintained.  So, I've decided to repost some of them here in case they may be of use to anyone.  This is the first of those...

⁷ So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loves a cheerful giver. ⁸ And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:7-8)

From the time children begin to perambulate and grab things, they start asking for everything they see in the stores.  Sometimes they even throw tantrums to get the desired toys, and goodies.  As a tired parent it is so tempting to buy silence with one of these tantalizing items.  However, as parents it is our duty to teach our children, even the youngest ones, to be good stewards of the gifts God gives them, and part of that lesson is instilling the virtues of patience and generosity, and a healthy respect for money.

Read any article on teaching kids about money, and you will find conflicting "expert" advice.  'The sooner you start teaching kids about money the better.'  But, 'don't give a child an allowance until he's old enough to count the money.' 'Give children an allowance, and tie it to chores,' or '… don't tie it to chores.'  Well, I'm no expert and my children are not yet finished growing, so I can't promise that my advice will work, but so far the results are encouraging.  I started teaching them about money very early, and I connected the lesson with serving God. 

First, we must answer for our children the question of where money comes from.  Most experts agree that children need to understand that we must work to earn money.  As Christians, we should also be teaching our children that it is a blessing from God.  God has given each of us talents that we can use to provide goods or services to others, and thereby earn money.  I fully agree with those who say the sooner we teach children about money the better.  Indeed, when my first daughter was three years old, we were given a magnetic responsibility chart.  I was thrilled to receive this chart because it gave me both a way to encourage good behavior and a method by which to start teaching her about money. 

Even though she couldn't count the money (at least not correctly), I began giving her an allowance linked to her responsibilities.  These included things like going to bed nicely, not hitting, obeying mom and dad, and sharing.  As she's grown older some of her responsibilities have changed to things like setting the table and cleaning her room.  Each night we put magnets on the chart for each thing that she did that day.  On Sunday mornings, we count up the magnets, and she receives a penny for each one.  If there are 7 in any row or column (there are 7 responsibilities for each day), she gets 2 pennies; and for a perfect week the reward is a full dollar.  Of course, the amount of allowance can be adjusted to suit your family income, the age of your child, or the difficulty of the responsibilities.  Giving an allowance linked to responsibilities or chores, even to very young children, teaches them in a concrete way that money is earned by using the gifts or talents God has given them.

God is very generous to us in the gifts he bestows upon us, so it is good to show our gratitude by sharing with the Church and others.  As parents, we teach this by example through our weekly church offerings and almsgiving, but we can also encourage our children to practice sharing themselves.  As I mentioned above, I dole out allowances on Sunday morning, and this is by design.  After each child has gotten her allowance, I ask "how much do you want to give to the church?"  Each then takes a portion of her allowance (and it's usually about 30%!) to put in her envelope*, and the rest goes into a piggy bank to be saved or spent.  In this way, we illustrate that the first portion, and a significant portion, of our gifts goes back to God.  By taking the weekly offering from their own money and making it a regular habit early on, I hope and expect that as they grow and earn more money, they will continue to find it easy to be generous and joyful in their offerings to God. 

As I said in the beginning, I believe it is my duty not to give into tantrums and impulse spending when we are shopping.  Thus, I long ago established a policy that when we were at the store, I would only buy what was on my list regardless of the screams that might accompany that rule.  This proved to be a good policy because such screams rarely happened after they saw that it was a firm rule.  Of course, that didn't stop them from asking for things on most trips to the store.  This is where the piggy bank money comes in.  It is saved until the occasion arises to spend it.  As I am trying to teach them the value of money and the importance of respecting it, it is only spent in consultation with me. When one of my daughters sees something in the store that she wants, we consider the price, what it is, and how much she wants it.  Sometimes she buys something right away, sometimes I veto the purchase.  Usually, we end up waiting "until next time," or until it goes on sale, or we have a coupon.  If she still wants it next time and has enough money saved or it's discounted, then she's allowed to buy it.  This not only teaches them to be wise about spending money, it also forces them to practice patience.  We don't always get what we want immediately, and sometimes we don't get it at all.  If we learn patience, however, we'll be a little more content no matter what life throws at us.

The last step in teaching children to be good stewards of God's gifts comes when a prize purchase comes home.  At this point there are two lessons to teach.  Lesson 1 is to take care of your things.  We've seen many a tear from a new toy being stepped on and broken.  I frequently repeat that toys must be put away when they're no longer being play with.  Sometimes they remember, sometimes not.  We're still working on respecting the blessings in our lives.  Lesson 2 is that we should share with those less fortunate.  Here by learning to share graciously with a sister who did not get to buy something new, we are reinforcing the virtue of sharing with everyone, both within and outside of the family.  While it is sometimes difficult to share that treasured, new toy, I have seen the fruit of this lesson in their eagerness to offer food to the homeless or toys for Christmas toy drives.

* Our church has offering envelopes for the children and tracks their donations along with those of the adults so each year they get a statement showing them how much they shared with God.   If your church doesn't have children's envelopes, consider buying some (for as little as $8 including shipping online) or making your own.  They are truly great for engendering in kids the desire to give their own money!